Hellooo First post. I need to vent to the internet as I feel shockingly terrible.
So i saw my GP to discuss the next step towards transition. She pointed me to a nearby (as rural areas go) doctor who knows about gender affirming care which is very cool.
During that she asked, just out of curiousity, if i was going to “socially transition” before or after medically transitioning.
For me, Ive decided to do so afterwards. Its just mentally painful for me to call myself a women while I look like the bloater from state of decay 2. Thats a terrible and comical way to put it but its how i feel and thats the image conjured in my mind.
I think its essentially that changing pronouns does very little for me while I am still a man physically speaking. And most its maybe a nice bump in happy chemicals and then a quick realisation that indeed I am still a man so i just feel terrible again.
Anyway, hope you have a nice day/evening :)
One thing I would point out is that social transition isn’t just getting others to see you as a woman; it’s learning to accept yourself as one too. That doesn’t happen without effort and practice, and using new pronouns is one part of that.
I see a lot of posts online by easily passing people who insist that HRT is doing nothing for them. Maybe they’re trolls, but I started girlmoding immediately and I started being gendered female a long time before I was able to see it for myself.
I made similar experiences. Sometimes it’s difficult for me to see the woman in the mirror (although it’s getting easier every day) but other people especially people who didn’t know me before my transition very quickly only really see me as a woman.