• Tyrq@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    1 day ago

    I know this is a whataboutism, and I fully support trans people, but what’s the acceptable circumstance to disown your kids; when you find them torturing animals for the third time? if they become a psycho murderer, despite, or because of, all your loving acceptance?

    • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
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      16 hours ago

      I mean, there’s a kid who grew up down the street. He pitched for the brewers. When he came outside at four years old and threw his older brother’s hamster across the street (to see if it could fly he said, and for a brief glorious second it could remember he pitched for the brewers?) the whole neighborhood apparatus went into play. All us older neighborhood kids, even the gang members and criminals, it didn’t matter we looked after and out for him. Like the gang just sold weed. They weren’t killing people (much) and wanted to keep it that way. We didn’t want another zodiac killer. And he turned out all right. Became a functioning fungible member of society. More than me. Pitched for the brewers and all. So to answer your question it takes more than one animal.

    • Katana314@lemmy.world
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      18 hours ago

      This is a writing scenario I’ve envisioned in a book (in part because said book needs a villain, and villain bad)

      A dad realizes on some level that his son isn’t just “gruff” like he is, but just plain mean and evil, and that none of the moral core he’s instilled has made it in - it’s not even upbringing, just that the kid is hateful and never self-reflective. And for a very short moment, he thinks about violent action.

    • teslasaur@lemmy.world
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      21 hours ago

      Disowning is your own perogative. meaning that you have to make the call.

      If your kid does break the law, then you have the social obligation to tell about it.

    • idiomaddict@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      I’d say that you have at least a minimal duty to them until they’re 18, no matter what. Even if they’re in prison for killing your other child, for a really extreme example, you have a duty to ensure that they’re safe and their needs are being met as well as possible (in prison, hopefully). You don’t have to shelter them from the police or anything, and I can understand if you no longer feel love for them, but you’re responsible for getting them to adulthood as best you can.

      Of course, I wouldn’t judge anyone actually in that situation for disowning their child (or any number of other reactions that I would consider ethically wrong, but that’s because they’re in a truly awful situation and it makes sense to go a little crazy), but it’s the moral ideal I would shoot for.

      • teslasaur@lemmy.world
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        21 hours ago

        If you raise a murderer before the age of 18, then you might deserve some of the blame. I think parents and other older individuals should be responsible for the actions of youths. If your kid breaks something, you pay it. If you enlist 13-15 year olds for murders (yes, this is very prevelant in Europe at the moment), you should be responsible for the crime.

      • anomnom@sh.itjust.works
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        24 hours ago

        If they’re in prison for an offense that truly justifies it, then they’re the in state’s custody, not yours.

        If my child killed their sibling with intent and not some tragic accident they’d be dead to me too.

        • idiomaddict@lemmy.world
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          22 hours ago

          They’re definitely in the state’s custody, though depending on where they are and whether they have anyone paying attention to what happens to them, that can mean abominable “care.” Again, I wouldn’t judge anyone for turning their back on the person who killed their child, but I think that I would feel an obligation to try to make sure my child wasn’t beaten or starved in prison.

    • velma@sh.itjust.works
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      1 day ago

      I would disown my kid for being a murderer if it was not for reason of insanity or self protection or otherwise justifiable, yes. Or a torturer, etc. There are certain extreme moral lines that I would have to acknowledge that my child as I knew them did not exist. But they are certainly of the most extreme, it would be very difficult to do so, and it would be very rare circumstances.

          • TrickDacy@lemmy.world
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            1 day ago

            There’s legal definitions and whatnot but my definition is more like “is there something deeply wrong with you?” Which a serial killer clears with ease.

            • Dave@lemmy.nz
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              23 hours ago

              What if they objectively made the world a better place? E.g. they were picking off the billionaires?

            • JoeBigelow@lemmy.ca
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              1 day ago

              There’s a lot deeply wrong with me but I’m still not clinically insane. Insane people genuinely don’t have control over their actions thus cannot be held to account, only put away for public safety. I think calling serial killers insane both absolves them of responsibility and dilutes the meaning of the word for people actually suffering serious mental illnesses.

              • TrickDacy@lemmy.world
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                1 day ago

                “Deeply” is both present in what I wrote and also subjective. I don’t think “insane” implies no control exactly. These things are more complicated than that.

                • JoeBigelow@lemmy.ca
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                  1 day ago

                  A person experiencing a fullblown psychotic episode is beyond the point of self control, and frequently self recognition. It’s a seriously rare occurrence, and it usually doesn’t result in the death of anyone but the sufferer. I just think the distinction should be made between people who may be highly disturbed or psychopathic, or on a revenge streak or whatever reason they have, and people suffering a very serious mental illness that in the midst of an episode wound up killing somebody.