😢

There are even some body-parts of mine, that I am ordered — by the law itself — to hide in public.!!!1

It was not that I would have been drained, no:

• I was, back then, simply — not — able — to — show up!

I really hope, that you never find yourself under such conditions, like (just as an example) depression can put you into, but “show up to them” was an option, as easily realised as if I tell somebody who’s paraplegic to just stand up and walk.

Again, I don’t complain, that that ended a possible friendship (or even more maybe). I fully understood and still understands it. But it was simply not in my range, to just "show up. It might be hard to believe me there, but that’s all I can say about it.

Was in that situation and nope … 30 minutes would have not even been the travel to them and even if I had lived next door to them: I would not have been able to make it there for 30 minutes. I accept that they never invited me to anything again and that we are not in contact any more (for other reasons as well) and I understand their response, but still: I was not able to!

My questions were rather rhetorical, as I too doubt, that one can easily distinguish between those with low batteries and those who may only claim to have low batteries (which is why opposed the “just be a friend” request from the top post in the first place. “Just be a friend” is not always that simple).

I wasn’t “really” asking for advice or the like. Sorry if I made the expression. I was rather just trying to speak on other peoples behalf. Thanks nevertheless for the good wishes.

Well, have you read the linked spoon theory? I ended a friendship once by not going to their birthday. I did nothing unavoidable and there was no option, no priority (unless loosing your normal even already part time job would be a valid option for you, to go to such a party) given. Yet still I hadn’t the energy left.

The difference is what you do around it.

Friend’s birthday is coming up next week, and they care about you and you wanna show you care about them? Well the day before (or whatever timeline you need), you don’t do anything that drains your batteries, or do things to recharge them, so that when it’s time to go to the party, the battery is full.

Have you read the story in my link? Getting out of bed, brushing your teeth, putting on clothes, leaving the house (because your boss do not accept a “no” regarding his demands for you to work today, and you need that job to pay your bills [or debts even]), etc. already costs. For a normal person, this would maybe count as recharge, if you skip yoga and pilates orders food instead of cooking yourself (if you have the money to do so, that is to say). For me on my bad days, this isn’t recharging, but going way over my limits. Plus one can have good or bad days and believe that it’ll be fine only to wake up, when the birthday is and … “shit”!

Believe me! I’ve been there and I’ve done that (loosing a persons friendship, because it was simply impossible to follow their invitation and celebrate that day with them together. It isn’t that easy, if your (here mental) health isn’t “normal”, as it may seem to you.

If we give it a number, then let’s say a birthday gift costs 50. It doesn’t matter if your battery holds 100 or 100, save 50 for the party.

And if your battery, without doing anything else, is at 10 or 20 … whilst the party costs 50? That was my situation, where a could be friendship ended.

[…] they just don’t spend their battery unless it’s a benefit to them. They won’t spend it on one of their friends unless it’s one of like, 2 specific people, so it’s an excuse.

Well, I have zero friends nowadays. So no excuse here. Plus I know of people whom, by their lack of friends, are going insane/suicidal, so I doubt them to only be presenting excuses there as well.

Agreed, and since I do not crave for friendship or social interaction, I’m even fine with not having any friends. Yet there are still those who do crave for friendships, whilst simply not having the energy to invest into them adequately. And for those I still feel sorry. Because of what I see: it doesn’t make things easier for them.

Any idea what the difference is between just saying that about the social batteries, because one simply doesn’t care and those batteries being really empty, due to mental health struggles? Would you tell Christine Miserandino to “just be a friend”, when she explains that she is not able to come? And please don’t tell me, that that is different, because Lupus is a real Illness, whereas mental illnesses …

It’s a satire account btw

Too bad! 🥹

If this is a anti-democrats pro-Trump thing (and yes I know that he’s in the bottom right, but who will recognise him on this years old pic?) then be aware, that I will not pity any of you if he comes to power in November.