It’s like a badly written “young adult” book written by someone who has never interacted with another human being, and none of the words have more than two syllables.
Con artist?
DO IT PLEASE MR. PRESIDENT, THIS IS THE BEST IDEA YOU’VE EVER HAD. THE PUBLIC WILL LOVE IT AND YOU WILL NOT BE HUMILIATED EVEN A LITTLE, OH PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE DO IT.
Edit: Aww no, nvm it’s not him singing.
[…] describing himself as someone who “gets much larger audiences than Elvis in his prime” and “does so without a guitar.”
The president floated the idea of replacing what he termed “highly paid, Third Rate ‘Artists’” with a speech by “the Number One Attraction anywhere in the World.”
He’ll just make the troops be there like he did last year.
Oh, wait - they’re tied up with Iran, Cuba, etc. Guess it’ll be ICE thugs this time.
Troops can get free tickets to the White House UFC fight. Except they have to pay for their own tickets and fr they have to be tall and fit, because the idiot doesn’t want to be offended by the look of the people who defend this country. [I suspect that white soldiers will get preferential treatment regarding ticket access and better seating. Honestly, I’m surprised that skin color wasn’t one of the selection criteria.]
I’m sure it’s assumed everybody knows by now.
Skin color is not part of the official criteria.
Fuck, that was only a year ago?? This shitshow has been going on for far too long, fucking hell.
my mom was crazy for elvis…
if she were alive today, she’d be nauseous at the very sight of the shitstained diaper.
It’s almost like he’s trying to get off’d maybe he’s sick of being a hand puppet. Please anyone, I’m just gonna stand on a stage for 2 hours.
Omg this might be the one funny thing he manages to do this decade
Great! Let’s see him tap dance.
*poopy dance
Instead of washed up artists, it’s going to be a 90 minute MAGA rally just like all his other ones. He will blame Democrats, Biden, and Obama, heck he will probably even throw Hilary in there. Then say something about being the greatest and best at everything ever created, and that we are hot.
There you go, you can skip the whole thing.
What even is this fuckass timeline
Maybe he will (you know what everyone is waiting for) expire and entertain us all in a last show of his humanity?
I want to see his body
paradeddragged down the streets.Humanity? Only on a technicality.
I used the term in the loosest possible way and only because he is, at least with his DNA, a human being.
We don’t actually have proof of that though. He almost looks the part, but he could spray paint a turd and it wouldn’t become gold.
Get ready for more jacking off of baby giraffes …
What is YOUR number?
How much would Trump have to PAY you to go to his concert?
Think carefully, get back tariff expenses, gas prices, grocery prices, airfare, mental health checkups…
I’d do it for $500k.
Enough money to fuck off and permanently retire in relative luxury in some 3rd world country. Never work another day in my life. Cut myself off from the news so I never have to see and hear this fucker ever again…
Paid in advance, of course. Because I don’t trust this guy as far as I can throw him. And I can’t throw his fat ass very far.
No, no, no, you have to STAY in this country. You have to be vested in this place.
Now how much?
Okay… $50 million, then.
Enough to do pretty much the same thing, but in the US. Gonna build myself a nice, luxurious off-grid cabin way the fuck off in the middle of nowhere and have no traffic in or out except for deliveries of groceries and hookers.
$1.776 billion. cash. from his personal and corporate accounts, plus another $500 for some really good noise-cancelling headphones i can plug into my old mp3 player.
None, because among other reasons he’d never make good on it.
Well, I see you’ve met Mr. Trump.
What’s even funnier/scarier is that about a third of Americans think that this is not a bad idea.
Might I suggest this number for his lineup?
He can use his ass horn.
His ugly ass on stage, waddling around in his weird shoes, jerking off invisible giraffes…
With tiny hands
And very likely shitting himself.
There’s still time to book the Four Seasons (Total Landscaping).
All this because his dad never hugged him?
I think his dad did a lot more less wholesome to him than that.
All this because a black man was president
