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I imagine its time to pretend he just now died. They will have thawed the corpse and put makeup on it for the photo shoot of him being wheeled to the corpse van. I bet they leave his face uncovered for that.
The spell that was cast on Lindsey Graham is finally paying up dividends. Slow acting spell, that one…
Them ladybugs will get ya
They’re going to wheel his corpse onto the Senate floor and have someone push the button for his vote.
Already did once, apparently.
Video?
Are we finally going to get some god damn answers?
They’re finally going to do something?
Actually shocked over here.
I hear you. This is absolutely unexpected.
not really, the story is unclear, but it may be the cops are there to keep reporters away.
“Protect the corpse!”
turtle with popcorn, subtly vibrating with excitement
Because necromancy is illegal? Because it’s illegal right?
I can’t believe that they had three months to hide the evidence and didn’t bother.
With friends like those Mr McConnell…
I still think he’s dead.
[taking my crab costume out of the closet, cleaning and ironing it…]
Please tell me that this is in response to a wellness check that someone called in when he didn’t show up.
I’m seeing conflicting reports. Newsweek says he did not show, and his staffers released a statement. CBS says he was seen in public and at the senate. Still have set to see any video evidence of this.
CBS is no longer a trusted source.
There’s clips of him being wheeled out of his house too. Doesn’t look like he spoke with any reporters. I’m guessing a stroke affected his speech. He certainly looks significantly older than three months ago.
Truly, I am shocked he is alive and looks as well as he does.
I’m still not ruling out a Weekend at Bernie’s situation. They had plenty of time to figure out how to puppet his corpse.
All it has to do is sit in a wheelchair.
It’s much easier with the wheelchair, you have a stable base and just use animatronics for the head and arms. Not a bad effort but wouldn’t hold up as a Disney World exhibit.
looks significantly older
There’s an episode of dr. Who where they age the doctor physically to match his age and glitchin’ Mitch still looks older than the 900 year old CGI goblin of 2010 BBC evening sci-fi. How could he possibly look any older?
Good match for Davros, the creator of the Daleks. Good match with the lore too.
Truth. Or a slitheen: he does give the impression of one who can readily unzip the meat suit.
He doesn’t look capable of readily doing anything, more like a pupal Slitheen realising the carapace they are stuck in is too tough and unmoving to escape from.
CBS lies.
CBS, is Faux Nooz for people with INDOOR plumbing.
“Borrowing” this
Use it in good health.
Fancy
It was in their name. Can’t Believe Shit
CBS says
With the conservative purchase of CBS, going forward you should assume “CBS says” carries the same amount of truth as “Alex Jones says”.
Holy shit, he’s actually alive!
Where’s the video?
Also, where do all the stories claiming he made a public appearance leave out the fact that capitol police have been at his house today?
There is video with no sound in the CNN article. Something fucky is up.
https://www.cnn.com/2026/09/14/politics/mitch-mcconnell-senate-return-health
For the past DECADE!
You want video AND audio? Man, what kind of super-camera do you have?
Alive like a carrot
Turns out, no matter how corrupt SCOTUS is, as long as it’s filled with white christians, necromancy is illegal
This is pathetic.
