talk to older people whose kids are grown. later millennials/gen-x/boomers aren’t as resistant to cold conversation and their children aren’t a factor.

besides, later millennials and gen-z are legit fucking weird and either don’t know how to have deep conversations or have no personality.

Gay bars would probably be a statistically better place

hobbies

Step 1: move to a big city with high rental cost in which having kids is not feasable for young families. Step 2: start a social hobby there Step 3: life the hedonistic lifestyle!

cons. go to the next dragon con.

I had my prior life completely destroyed, and spent about 5 years getting my health together, and last August began integrating myself back into society. Starting with zero social network, in just a few months of dance classes and social dancing, I have more friends and things to do than I’ve ever had in my life. I do swing/Lindy Hop, which is popular in my area, and also some ballroom dancing, but a lot of people do Salsa/Bachata. I cannot overstate how awesome this has been for meeting people. As a single man, it’s especially powerful, as you have an easy introduction (“would you like to dance?”), you’re immediately in their intimate space, and if you’re any good at all you’re delivering a fun, custom choreographed experience that lights their face and makes them smile from ear to ear. At 60 years old, my social life has never been better, and I’m having fun with attractive women of all age ranges.

Join a club, try to find others that are like-minded. I’ve got friends who are recent parents and it made me have a look at my social circle and figured it was time to expand my social circle.

Lots of people are feeling lonely simply because they don’t know where to meet any new people. I’d say see if your place of residence has some sort of meeting center where you could organise something. If only one person shows up it might be a success already.

You need a 3rd space. Join a sport/hobby/club.

The real problem is meeting people while being selective. Hosting events and posting online is an option but you literally can’t be selective and you’ll have to be okay with nobody showing up sometimes. Attending other peoples events might suit you though!

You could make friends through a multiplayer games dischord.

Going to the same place regularly is a good one. Cafes, Book stores, etc can be 3rd spaces, especially if they host community events. Bars as well but that isn’t gonna contribute to a healthy lifestyle.

Younger crowd works for a bit in your early 30s but every year past 35 it feels less and less natural. It’s not just generational, like they’re in a completely different phase of life. At a certain point you’re just not growing up tbbh.

RE people with kids, you gotta just accept that they’ll participate when they can.

A/S/L?

jk, I’m old

Club.

Joined a choir and a wind band last year, now I’m on first name basis with the mayor. I didn’t realise that especially the wind band was full of well-connected people.

(fyi I am not sponsored, I’ve just used these and liked them)

I’m in a similar boat, but I’ve had good luck with just finding clubs and going through meetup. Even if you only go once or twice it’s still something new to do.

Volunteering is always a good option too, gets you out and meeting people and you get to help your community. The parks and food banks especially always need volunteers.

And the last one I’ll recommend is an app called Timeleft. It’s paid ($20 a month) but you get to basically pick from the events they have and either go for dinner or coffee and meet with 6 random others on the app. I like it because there no pressure, it’s not a dating app or anything, and you get to just hang with some open minded people for a few hours and chat. Everyone is identified so there’s safety with it, and after each event you get to give out (and receive) little impressions like “Who felt the most welcoming”, “who was good at leading conversation”, “who was a good listener” etc.

Either way, it can feel challenging sometimes, but the options are out there. And as always, don’t be afraid to host something and just throw the invites out, worst case people are too busy but most of the time people want to hang out, they just don’t want to plan it.

If anyone is going to hang with younger crowds, try to make a rule for yourself. I’m in the mid-30s and I would not be comfortable anymore trying to hang with early 20-year olds. So, more of my flow is the later-20 year olds like the 26, 27, 28 and the like.

Many queer people, including couples. Some do of course, but the majority do not.

just cruising or walking around outdoors etc

Hiking clubs, cycling groups, and other hobby clubs. Even potluck dinners. Yeah, some older people will try to find ways to get free time and touch base.

Just to repeat whatever other people are saying here: Join any scheduled activity that happens weekly.

You can do yoga, spinning, sports when they have 30+ groups, dancing, pottery class, painting class, hiking groups etc.

You can also convert other friend sources to board game groups via house parties where you have easy games first then bring out harder stuff later.