A: grey is a golddigger, green dodged a bullet
B: grey thinks green is a lesser choice, green dodged a bullet
And then grey feels humiliated by grey noticing this.
I ain’t sayin she’s a golddigger
Nah, that’s just your biases in this scenario. That’s not in the text
Neither one is someone I want to talk to but grey really should’ve just put the phone down and focused on that promising opportunity
I hope they got in such a tizzy over this that it ruined their “plans with someone else” cause they showed up all sour.
Dating culture is so toxic, I’m glad it’s just me and my cat these days…
I don’t think grey actually has another “opportunity”. This feels like a negging tactic to me.
Remind me what negging is again
If I understand it correctly, it’s the use of negative framing of another person’s physical attributes or demeanor, constructed in the hope the receiver of the “negging” has low enough self-esteem to agree with the assessment and will assume the asshole is a person of higher intrinsic worth.
There might be more to it, but I usually just think of it as a form of reverse psychology + emotional abuse.
That’s right, thanks. I haven’t heard it in awhile
I think demeaning or belittling are the old timey terms for the same behavior. Negging is just the term when it’s used as a strategy by incel/pickup culture assholes.
Gotcha. That makes sense
Green has a decent counter play against being snubbed first, but it surely is a dick move versus just saying “okay, cheers”.
However, we humans do crave drama, and I’ve been entertained, so I think in the grand scheme of things, as a miniature Shakespeare tragic comedy, I will allow for it to be cosmically more good than bad. Perhaps they both learned something. Or it’s all fake ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Not sure if I’d count what Green did as bad, in any way.
Petty, maybe, but justice demanded grey have some social consequences for their behaviour, and green most certainly delivered.
Having someone show their red flag this early warrants a “thank god” methinks. Also, “thank the flying spaghetti monster” is more like it.
I’d throw in a Hail Satan for good measure tbh
Also, “thank the flying spaghetti monster” is more like it.
Christ alive, y’all are some enlightened individuals. *tips fedora*
Christ alive
Spelled Chris wrong, buddy.
Red flag? “This is going to sound bad but I need to cancel, sorry” is way more than you’ll get dating, 90% of the time. IG they could’ve told them sooner, but I also don’t know how serious things are. It looks like a perfectly adult response.
Regardless, saying “Thank God” when you were just confirming a date with someone feels like a knee-jerk reaction to save face and insult the person you feel ditched you.
The proper and respectful way to cancel a date would be to say - for example - “look, I’ve thought this through and I am not feeling it, I changed my mind about further dates, I appreciate the time you spent with me & I wish you all the best!”
The red flag here is mentioning someone “promising” and not wanting to miss the opportunity. It says in the same words “you are not a promising character”. The comparison is the hurtful thing you don’t say out loud if you want to be respectful of someone’s feelings.
And the proper respectful thing would be to give the person you’re cancelling with more notice than an hour before hand, and only after they contacted you to confirm.
teal really proved living well is the best revenge.
Could’ve been, “Thank God, you found a promising opportunity. Hope it goes well”.
No, he said Lmao. She dumped him after he lost his. job.
Did they lose their. job. though?
Oh, he said out of work, not…oof
Grey didn’t value Green’s time, even stated someone better came along. Green responded with shade in response for this lack of respect, Grey had a crash out because her lesser choice had teeth.
Interesting you feel that was the her. There at no genders stated.
I mean, for most of the post they tried not to and a single “her” fell out. Something to consider.
I feel it is an interesting question though. I too assigned genders while reading this the first time so is it naturally ingrained in me? Or is it because of the first person POV of text message exchanges like this?
Are women reading this and assuming the other way around? Would a different format (eg changing the bubbles to other side, or paragraph format like in a novel) change who we think is which gender?
I try to be impartial, but each misstep online gets hammered on hard because apparently you need to be perfect for the imperfect themselves. Changing now would just be admitting to something i"m not so you cannot win. Shrugs I do my best and try to not let small mistakes turn into mountains.
As well I see other people posting the grey is female initially so that might have influenced me and I didn’t see anyone else calling them out.
This is an /r/SipsTea male rage bait post, of course the chuds think it’s about them.
Who’s in the wrong here?
Everyone in this thread who is too stupid to realize this is fake rage bait.
As is your comment. Rage bait within rage bait. Meta rage bait. Ragebaitception. Ragebaiturducken. I see you.
Have you ever considered that other people are smart enough to realize it’s probably a hypothetical scenario?
The important thing is that you found a way to appear superior to everyone.
Grey is scum
Grey is faking outrage to get out of the situation
Grey is already out of the situation by message 3, everything after that is just lashing out due to a bruised ego.
Their ego was flying high, having choices, only to come crashing down when one was relieved to get rid of her, LOL. Now she’ll go on her “opportunity” date, and be all sullen and pouty, and ruin that one, too.
Hilarious.
You
Most likely, statistically, they’re both shitty people.
what did green do wrong?
He knows exactly what he did.
Born male.
British
That’s my take.
I don’t get why people are confused about this.
Grey was horrible human being first. Green’s reply was a response that horribleness. It’s not like green was genuinely waiting to spring that.
…probably.
Their parents.
I mean its 95% fake but it doesnt really make a difference for discussing it as if it was real.
I think it deoends on the relationship between the two and the kind of meeting they had planned. If its a date and grey bailed for an other date, thats really shitty. If it was a casual meetup between friends and grey bailed for a dating opportunity, its not that shitty and green was a bit rude with the follow-up, but again depends on their relationship and how they usually communicate. In any case, the last few messages are completrly overboard.
Maybe they were pals and Green was saying “thank God” in a good-natured “yay, you finally got a date, happy for you bruh” manner but the response went right over Grey’s head and led Grey to make a total ass of themself.
Though if that were the case, I’d figure they’d clear that up rather than no reply and posting the screenshot.
Oh I didnt even think of that.
Eh, even taking the must charitable view for the canceller, you could also bee charitable to the other one and say that everyone feels relief at cancelled social plans
Hm, not sure I understand what you mean? I dont think its common to feel relieved about cancelled plans. If you dont want to meet, why make plans in the first place?
Found the neurotypical
Get em!
Its very common for people with ADHD, autism, depression or some other mental problems that fuck with your executive function and mental capacity. AMD considering how technical and niche Lemmy is, I’d wager that about 50% of the userbase fall under any of those categories.
I want the credit for hanging out without actually hanging out.
What credit? Who needs you to hang out with people besides you and them?
Credit with the person who bailed!
We can’t know for certain based on one single conversation. We don’t know the dynamic between these two. We don’t know the intent behind the “thank god” comment. We don’t know if the response was an overreaction, something that’s been building between these two, or what.
It wouldn’t be smart to make a judgement in this case because we lack full context.
Beep bop ai
I am for having read this. Doubly for commenting,
Hahaha, sucker!
…
wait, shit
