Immediately thought he must be dead. I was just saying to my partner how awesome the JP music is while we watched whatever the new piece of crap (but entertaining) thing was. Great music. Some of the best.
I wish you warm pillows and icy bathroom floors
Soggy french fries, a dead remote control.
May your favorite shirt never fit right again.
Whoa. I’m saving this one for sure. 😂
You’re a monster…
HQGifs?!
Not mine, but likely originated from.
i hate this day i hate this day i hate this day
my parent’s anniversary today btw. source of much ribbing for them.
Unrelated, but I just learnt that Dick van Dyke is 100 years old as of last December and still kicking.
That… How many degrees of Kevin Bacon did you fly through, to reach this thought? 👀
Famous old man still alive
I hope you go pee in the toilet pull up your pants or put your dong back in your pants and then some pee comes out of your private part that was left inside of said private part and leaks in your pants while at your workplace so you have to be wet for awhile in your crotch area.
The proper terminology is “crotchal area.”
This happens to me a lot. Do you think it’s a curse like this or should like see a doctor maybe?
Nah just visit calicocutpants dot com
Hmm, thanks but those patterns are a bit too subtle for me.
Trust me, I give.
Milk the gooch
At work?
I’d like to add I hope your coffee spills on your breakfast on your way to work and you don’t have time to get another breakfast or coffee.
I don’t drink coffee, my breakfast is usually a meal replacement shake, and I work from home on most days. I wonder what long series of extremely improbable events would have to happen for me to end up owning any coffee at all and then somehow having it end up in my shaker bottle while I’m on route from the kitchen to my office.
It’s all good, man
sneaky. great bit.
Haha top tier shit post.
Almost had my heart drop out my ass reading this.
LMAO
Literally made my heart jump.
You made me say “WHAT THE FUCK, NO!” in a meeting.
And didn’t you learn a valuable lesson about scrolling socials when you should have focused on those KPIs?
Pretty asshole post, ngl
Fuck you. Up your nose with a rubber hose
