I once got told off for being at a gay bar by an older lesbian couple. They said “our kind didn’t belong there” after they saw me dancing with my (just-out-of-the-closet) male friend and I guess assumed we were straight 🤷.

I understand they get annoyed when straight people just come to their parties because it is fun, because it is supposed to be a safe space and a space where you go to look for other gay people. At the same time, I wanted to be supportive of my friend and continue going to parties together.

And then you end up wearing as little as possible underneath and looking way to sexy in the hallways.

Did you reply with the dead salmon in mri experiment?

Agree, my smart watch has stopped me grabbing my phone all the time and helps me get less distracted.

I’m dutch and I’ve lived abroad (EU) for most of the last 8 years. I’m now trying to settle down permanently in France. It’s been only 1.5 years but I think I will always be a “dutch person in France”, just because of my accent, name and the fact that some habits here are just not going to become mine comfortably. However, in NL I feel like an outsider sometimes and I started getting comments about my dutch sounding foreign. Being with my family is nice, but with foreign experience, you just see habits and customs in a different way.

That said, it doesn’t really bother me too much. I made the choice myself to emigrate knowing the consequences and being the goofy outsider fits me.

One thing that works for me is to try to do something instead of trying to avoid doing things. So instead of saying I can’t have cake, I say I have to start the day with a healthy breakfast with protein and I have to eat 200 grams of veggies. In the end it leads to me eating less cake, but mentally it is easier. You only have to do the thing once (per day) but you have to avoid things every fucking minute.

Did you become desensitized to it or just never liked it?

My friend has dyslexia and has just started a phd in chemistry. The only time I notice is when we try a crossword and he just has no concept in his head of how long words are and which letters go where.

Through my sports club I volunteer at sporting events every once in a while, like handing out water at races.

I also joined the animal rescue when I was younger, helping clean cages for the rabbits and pigeons etc. For that I just found the local rescue and signed up. In the end I didn’t like the atmosphere that much, because most people were lower class without a job and I was a student at university. I felt like I had little in common to talk about and I was the only one who didn’t smoke. You also have zero time to actually enjoy spending time with the animals.

I think spiders in cars cause quite a few accidents due to distracted drivers. There must be some people who freak out over ants the same way.

Pretty much yes. And listen to your body in how different foods make you feel on the bike. For me headaches and low appetite/mild nausea after a ride were the big indicator I hadn’t eaten enough.

Oof, I hate ice cold water. I always drink room temp or slightly cooled… but I like your idea. Perhaps I’ll give sparkling water another try.

Thanks for the elaborate response. I’m finishing up my doctoral thesis at the moment and hopefully when that is done the main stressor in my life is gone. I’ve tried many of your tips about including others and keeping them out of the house, but somehow I always find an excuse to get them again.

That works up to a point, but not on multiday rides and definitely not when doing high intensity stuff. And “carb loading” is recommended to be done for 2-3 days, not just the night before.

It depends a lot on how intense your activities are. 6+ hours easy pace where you are not out of breath and can maintain conversations means a lot of energy can still come from fat burning, so you can fuel more easily in a few large wholefood meals with some candybars or snacks in between. The gels and stuff come in when you go more intense for long durations as you use more carbs and when carbs are depleted you start using protein for energy.

I make my own gels with 100 gram maltodextrine, 50 gram fructose and a bit of pectine, in 100 ml liquid (boiling water or water+flavoring like espresso/lemon juice). You can put them in refillable babyfood pouches and store in the fridge for a few days. My gut likes them because they are easy to absorb and don’t contain unusual flavorings and chemicals. For 6+ hour efforts I would stop at 60 grams/hour just because the longer duration makes it harder to tolerate high sugar amounts for the gut, but that’s personal and can be trained.

The gel recipe came from a youtube video… if I find it back I’ll add the link.

I’m stuck on two cans a day, with bad days going up to 4 cans. I do drink loads of water in between.

I have tried that a few times, but can never make it last. Sparkling water doesn’t do it for me and sugar-free gives me gastro issues. I think I accidently made cokes my emotional support food. Does anyone have any tips?

Leave the damn squirrels alone!

You look amazing! No need to lose more weight.

Some examples from flemish (belgian dutch) to dutch:

I remember the first time in a swimming pool in flanders I was so confused by all the signs saying I shouldn’t walk.