Funny cat image as a reward for opening the post
I joined a random Deep Rock Galactic lobby once. Usually I host them so it was odd for me join one idk why I even did that. Ended up becoming friends with one of the people in there and they’re one of the best most caring people I know. We talk almost every day now
Last time I played DRG, it truly had one of the least toxic and most friendly gaming communities I know.
Maybe I should jump back in again. Got 1000 hours in it (never had so many in any game before), but stopped playing for stupid reasons and moved on to other things afterward.It’s a gem of a game and yeah perhaps one of the best communities I know. You’re always welcome to rock and stone :3
joined mastodon back in 2017
it made me the person i am today, in every way
it was a critical moment in my gender identity journey and finding the place definitely steered me in the right direction
over the years i’ve escaped my abusive family and came to seattle thanks to fedi, met my best friend and joyfriend both through fedi, and formed a strong sense of community on the servers i host there
i was even in a book about fedi thanks to the work i’ve done!!!
i owe everything good in my life presently to the fediverse 🥹
So I’ve had two things that kinda go hand in hand that have really made a big improvement in my quality of life:
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I started working out. During the pandemic lockdowns I picked up a basic fitness routine called Hybrid Calisthenics (they no longer list the basic 5 day routine I was doing but still brilliant explainers on that site for starting a new routine!), and went from struggling to lift 50lbs to being able to perform my first pullups ever. I changed jobs and lost my time for workouts but then I went and took my old bike for a tuneup to start riding it again with the goal of biking my kids to/from school and immediately realized how out of shape I was, so that became my new goal (and I rapidly fell in love with cycling) then I saw an ad for a 4th of July 5k and went “oh that’s like a quarter of how far I ride my bike I should totally do that!” And now I run 5ks too! The old me could never do that and would never have dreamed of doing any of these things but now I have races to look forwards to!
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I’ve started a long term process of reducing my screen time. I’ve noticed how no matter what I’m doing with screens it just isn’t making me happy and everything off screen gets neglected. So I’ve started focusing more on trying to pick up more hobbies to do with my hands. I’ve started building a model railroad, I’ve been reading a ton of books (I think about a couple dozen books or more in just the last 12 months) and not spending as much time soaking in news and doomer takes on the internet has greatly helped me be a much happier and more realistic person. This one’s an ongoing struggle though. The screens are right there and offer so much momentary entertainment (such is why I’m typing this right now) and doing stuff like drawing is really hard as my hands struggle to draw what I have in my head since I haven’t really drawn in a long time. My ultimate goal is a healthy balance of screen and non-screen time during my free time
Oh and a bonus item that I didn’t even think of initially: going back to college. A few years ago I decided to go back to college at the worst possible time. I had a baby on the way and was working full time, but I made it work. Even when my wife had to quit her job and I was the sole income while going to school full time, I threw all of my irons into the fire, pumped the bellows as hard as they’d go and worked myself to the brink of burnout and got a degree, immediately landed a job paying twice what I was making before with way better benefits and coworkers, a super chill work environment and through an insane series of events I now only work about 30 hours a week fully remotely and make enough money that not only can my wife be a stay at home mom but I could afford to go on my first international trip last month and have 2 more (much smaller in scope!) trips planned for this year still. I seriously never thought I’d be able to realistically afford intercontinental travel before, and now it might well be a thing we do every year or two!
All of this is ace, I may not know you but i’m proud of you internet stranger/friend!
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Went sober.
For me it was a small change. I was having a drink here and there, maximum 3 beers a night. I just found that it made me feel like shit the next morning even after having one, and I no longer enjoyed the feeling of even a mild buzz. There was also a huge relief at not having to figure out which situation to drink in or not. Do I have a drink at this birthday party? After a hard day? While barbecuing? If I am just sober the answer is always no, so it eliminates one choice.
Started putting powdered fiber in my morning coffee and now I have fantastic poops. I also bought a bidet which is nice too.
I also do fiber every morning, but I don’t know if I’d ruin my coffee with it. I mix it up in a tiny glass with water and basically shoot it so I can enjoy the taste of everything else
Its flavorless and dissolves completely so I don’t notice it at all.
What do you use? I use psyllium husk and it’s gritty
The Costco brand of Benefiber
This person’s butt is living a life of luxury
Crazy, I literally made both those changes this year as well. I highly recommend both
Real talk, do you get hella gassy and if so how do you deal with it? I’ve been making an effort to eat more fiber and it’s created levels of gas that has me concerned that the US might bring me democracy soon.
First off, if you make a change to a higher fiber diet, you’re likely to have increased flatulence while your gut microbiota acclimates. Second, there are different fiber sources that each person may respond differently to. Personally, some legumes will make me gassy no matter how I cook them, but when I throw a serving of psyllium husk in whatever I’m eating, I have no problem.
As a vegan who mostly eats fruit and raw veg, I am EXTREMELY gassy. Holy shit, I fart all day.
Not particularly to the point that I’ve noticed any difference though I’ve heard that can happen. I’m typically only doing 1-2 servings a day despite the bottle suggesting 3-5 servings, so maybe that’s the difference.
Your body gets used to it after a while, although you may still be a bit more gassy than people who shit once a week.
You may have an intolerance to certain foods. Look up low FODMAP diet. Certain types of food can fermented in the gut and make tou gassy/bloated. Ive found that I dont have an issue with wheat, but switching to lactose-free dairy and avoiding onions has helped me immensely.
I’ll check that out, I already do dairy-free except cheese and butter but I will be damned if I avoid onions.
Why not just eat some more fresh fruits and vegetables…?
Because Agrocorp Phibre ® was only $10 a bucket at the big box store. I don’t care that it’s derived from blended chicken anuses melted in rainwater from Chernobyl, it’s cheap!
Fr who needs micronutrients when you’re hitting your macro goals?
Oh, I got a good one. I started leaving earlier and driving slower. It’s way safer and I get great mileage. It’s also more relaxing to not be so worried about making good time.
I don’t drive yet so I don’t really get why mileage is important. Is it because you’re getting money back for fuel or is it just so you feel justified in paying to keep a car? Or is it more healthy for a car to get more driving in?
There’s also the safety aspect. A lot of the habits that help you go farther on a tank of gas also make accidents less likely or less serious
I’m assuming your on the younger side if you don’t drive and as a local youngin myself (early 20s) I don’t understand myself outside of being a vigorous rule follower
-But a lot of cars get better mileage when in the 60-70 mph range (I think that’s roughly 100kph if memory serves, which it usually doesn’t) -It’s also just safer, traveling slower means less distance to stop, meaning you have a bigger window of reaction time before you put that crumple zone to the test -(I feel like a lot of EV owners forget this cus there’s no gas and clearly that’s the only thing in a car) but your car is a bunch of moving parts most importantly the wheels, so your brakes and tires will thank you -As another lemming mentioned seeing that one BMW pass you, then you get to catch up on them at a red light, 1 they used more gas, as motion is energy, and more motion needs more fuel. On top of that since they were driving like they’re doing it “for family” in a summer block buster starring Dwight “the stone” John. Meanwhile you get to glide nicely towards the red light giving your brake disks a light hug
But keep in mind a difference in traffic speed is dangerous both ways. Yes the guy doing 120 in a 70 is a menace but so is the guy doing a 40 as they’re basically and obstacle. I usually do 70 (freeway speed limit for a stretch where I live) or 60 (speed limit for a majority of the freeway past a town) but sometimes everyone’s doing 90+ so I have to raise my speed. It’s why a lot of driving instructors will say that speed limits important but so is flow of traffic (tho flow of traffic outweighing the speed limit when determining your own speed has been very rare for me)
TLDR, less money for gas and maintenance, and more importantly (wish I had more examples of the top of my head) safety
Internal combustion engine cars don’t consume gas at a constant rate. You can think of it like as you press the gas pedal you’re making the fireman on a steam engine shovel more coal into the fire. The harder you press on the pedal the faster the fireman is grabbing shovelfuls of coal and tossing it into the fire, and the harder that engine has to work. The more the car can just coast with just a tiny bit of fuel tossed in to maintain speed, the less fuel goes into the fire.
A relaxed driving style where you slowly accelerate, brake gently, and don’t speed/change lanes a lot means a lot less time pressing hard on the gas pedal and a lot less time burning lots of fuel. Also gentler braking will mean less wear on your brakes and tires so they may last a bit longer (tires and brakes are wear items that need to be replaced regularly, but the frequency is impacted by your driving style)
Such a relaxed driving style is also much safer because it gives you and other drivers more time to react and it’s more predictable to all road users
You’ve already paid for the gas that’s in your tank, best you can do is get the most miles out of it. Long term habits that increase overall average MPG also reduce wear and make parts last longer. Biggest thing is not speeding up when you see a red light ahead.
Ever since I started thinking this way, I started finally seeing all the other cars scurrying past me to get to the same red light that we all stopped at. It compounds the calming effect to see validation through others demonstrating the futility of what I no longer choose to do.
edit: To be clear, I’m not saying I totally drag ass and block traffic. I’m just talking about smoothing out my acceleration curves a bit and the occasional person who zips around everyone else, only to hit a stoplight with the rest of us. I’m not that old yet.
Oh I’m definitely in the slow category, according to the cars behind me.
Don’t get me wrong, I do the speed limit, and heck still sometimes the appropriate “5 over” if there’s cars behind me.
But that’s not enough for most people, they race around me anyway.
But more than just not speeding up when I see the red light, I watch the light from farther away. It’s very flat here, and if you pay attention you can see the light turning from 10 or 20 seconds away, and adjust appropriately. You can even time the light to know it’ll turn red before you get there.
I’m not counting seconds or anything, it’s more of a vibe check. “That light has been green a looong time, it’s definitely turning red before I get there.”
So depending on who’s behind me and ahead of me and how far away I am, I’ll either start coasting down to maybe 5 or 10 under as I approach, that way I can use my brakes even less.
I get pretty good at it with the lights on my way to work. But some lights are un-timable. Their timing is almost purposely designed to waste gas.
And one stretch of lights changes depending on time of day to create a unidirectional flow of traffic. You’ll hit every green going south at 3pm, but every red going north. Stuff like that.
Using brakes is wasted gas, lost efficiency. I get a whole 5 or 6 more mpg driving my wife’s car, than when she drives it. Maybe more. Every time I drive it I watch the average tick up. For her it hovers around 25/26. I’ve seen over 31 in the same car.
Again I’m not the guy who painfully slowly accelerates, angering everyone. I know how to stand on the pedal when I need to. I just pay attention, and accelerate and brake maybe a little more smoothly.
If you accelate hard, drive fast, etc, you get lower gas mileage.
So if you drive 1000 miles per month, and you’re getting 25 miles per gallon, then at $4/gallon you’re paying $160 for gas a month. If you ease up and can average like 32mpg, you’ll only spend $125. Better results may be possible.
Ahhhh I accelerate very quickly because it’s fun, and I brake very slowly because I like not wearing my brake pads down. So I really only accelerate hard if there’s a ton of space in front of me and good side-visibility so I don’t have to risk sudden breaking (obv not only for my brakes, but so I don’t hurt anything!)
But I am soooo accelerating fast at every safe opportunity because it just feels awesome lawl. Then again, in a good month, I’m going 100-200 miles or less (partner and I both gremlins) so the fuel expenditure is maybe 10 bucks a month. Not even that high.
Great scenario for an EV! You’re not losing the efficiency by accelerating hard, can accelerate harder, and you make some of it back by using regen when you slow down
I read once a question on whether it’s better to rapidly accelerate to your vehicle’s most efficient speed / gear, or just creep up to it.
In my old wagon, once I hit 60kph (~40mph) it goes into 4th and drops to ~1250rpm. I tend to use moderate acceleration up to that speed then just chill.
I also recall the term ‘pulse and glide’ from hypermiling which might have some relation, but without the gliding bit.
Oh yah. My last car was a hybrid (loved it!) but that was before EVs were very attainable. I got my current car a long while ago when someone smashed my last one to death. I loved seeing the regenerative braking work!
My car now is all gas, but she’s got low mileage and the ultimate “trim” or whatever and I love her and all of her million speakers and subwoofer very much.
I’d love an EV for my next car if I can find one that isn’t a privacy nightmare (my car is from the tail end of when you could get cars that DIDN’T phone home what you talk about in them) but hopefully I’ll have my current car forever and won’t have to worry about that.
My cat decided to live at a neighbor’s 3 doors down. One day I thought “I’ll invite her to the barbecue party”. Six years later, we’re married and have a 2 year old boy (and five more cats).
That cat knew what it was doing.
That is delightful. I hope you occassionally call that cat, “wingman”,
When I rolled my character on that WoW server, I didn’t expect to move so far from home and spend the rest of my life with someone I’d meet online.
Nerd
I was bored as hell, looked up the phone number of someone I used to know before we moved to opposite ends of the country. I got an invite to a discord, and we now have two nights per week set aside for gaming together. Not just him, but the others on the discord too, so I’m not as socially isolated anymore.
looked up the phone number of someone I used to know before we moved to opposite ends of the country
Your comment reminds of… like… I just realized I haven’t really directly talked to my aunts or cousins in China for…
well the entire time I’ve been in the US… like nearly 2 decades
idk why, I never really felt an attachment… don’t have much memories of them, I was only 8 when my family left…
Now it feels too awkward to suddenly call them…
Call them. Yes, it’s probably gonna be awkward, but well worth it.
For that I’m gonna need to make a WeChat account…
Might need to use a separate phone for opsec purposes 👀 (you know why)
Feels like too much of a hassle… and like its not like I feel safe to just speak freely…
Mom and older brother is going back to visit (like right now), and mom told me to not send her any political stuff or she’ll block me…
Like I’m just so used to how things work in the west, I’m gonna have to run every sentence through my brain like can I actually say this and not get them in trouble
Taking my car instead of a Uber as I should have that night. It sure changed my life!
I just realized OP did not specify whether he wants to hear about small decisions that changed our life in a good way, or a BAD way.
joined an “adult band program” at a music school.
after being vaguely musically inclined since early childhood, 24 years of playing bass, 20 years guitar, six years seriously on keyboards, I’ve only ever really played by myself along to music that I like.
after a few months rehearsing with the group weekly and taking weekly keyboard lessons, I played four songs on keyboard on stage at a bar with the group. Feels like a monumental leap forward for me. I’m still basically just covering other peoples’ music, but now with others and having a blast doing it. This next round I’m also doing a few songs on bass on top of doing some songs on keys.
And now one of the folks from that group invited me to join his band outside of the music school.
Lines up so well with losing my job and having a lot more free time. Keeps me feeling good about myself, gives me stuff to look forward to. And helps me not just wallow in grief and avoidance after our beloved dog of 12 years died late last year (been almost six months and I still cry almost every night thinking about him).
Can’t recommend this “adult band program” sorta thing enough if you got some ability with a guitar, bass, synth, drums, or vocals! I’m doing it through a local School Of Rock franchise but there’s other places that do the same sorta thing
About 15 years ago I decided not to be in a hurry when I’m driving, and also to not get frustrated with any other drivers. I just figured I’m gonna be spending too much time of my life in a car I might as well not be getting upset about it. For aggressive drivers I make up a story about how they have explosive diarrhea or something else urgent to attend to. It has made a profound and permanent improvement to my life. Would recommend to a friend.
I did this too. Amazing how you still end up arriving at almost the same time as when you drove like a maniac hey?
I think it’s made me more flexible with time in general. But yeah stoplights and traffic matter more than how you drive. It’s futile to think you can go any faster, just enjoy the ride.
You can add crying kids in the car to your excuses, because that’s the only time I am speeding nowadays.
I’m an Uber driver currently and this approach is vital for sanity/happiness/tips. I drive borderline grandma-style now and have gotten more than one compliment for the smooth trip, etc.
Sorting my socks based on color. White socks are short socks. Black socks are long socks.
Now when I grab socks, I just have to do a quick glance to find the right length socks.
Also, any sock with random prints designs are always long socks, so I don’t have to worry about that
wait, you guys don’t lose your socks pretty much every time you take them off?? I’m down to 2 socks. I had a 10 pack at one point. Same as undies. I’m down to like 3 undies again :/
Have you looked in the laundry basket? That’s where mine usually end up after I take them off.
nah, I’m pretty sure gremlins are taking all my socks and undies.
6 years ago: messaging a person on reddit. Tomorrow is our wedding
I love that! I met someone on Tinder while my ex-fiance and I were breaking up just as someone to fuck while I got over our breakup. Ended up marrying them 8 months later, and been together for over 9 years now.
Haha sameee i was just bored and low key horny and they looked hot. I saved them from homelessness in 2022 due to their dad kicking them out. Helped them integrate and get used to in a new country and now they have a very well paying job :3 I love them so much!!
Congratulations!
Congratulations!
congrats! That’s awesome. I hope you have decades of happy love together :)
Awww thank youu. Its genuenly funny in a sad way that strangers on the internet are nicer and happier for my marriage than my mother :(
After unsuccessfully trying different budget managers over the years, I payed a considerable (at the time) amount for one that uses the envelope system (YNAB) and that is exactly the kind that works for me. Before that I always lived paycheck to paycheck, never had any money left and constantly ran into trouble. Now I have peace of mind with everything planned out and thinking a year or more ahead instead of in the moment.
I realized recently I do envelope budgeting except by flinging money between different bank accounts instead of any normal and sane method of doing so. On the upside, I have enough money earmarked for computer upgrades to upgrade every computer in my house, but none of them really need it and I don’t want to pay AI bubble prices so I’m just letting that cash stack grow for now
It sounds like you’re having a few accounts for savings, hobbies, groceries and so on. That’s very good already!
Envelope budgeting can actually can go so deep to have categories for each subscription, insurance, savings and so on. This makes you stop looking at the accounts total available money and instead only see what is actually available after everything else is distributed.
I have two accounts: one is a checking for everything that I need the current month and a savings for the rest, so I earn a (tiny) interest from it.
Same. Went from panicking at the end of every month to being able to tell my (then) wife: “We will be able to afford a house in XX months”. It took so much stress away. Takes a little time to go from full freestyle to having a proper budget, but once it’s cruising, life suddenly is much easier.
