If you’re lucky, you’ll only get me talking about glacial surficial geology
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I’m sure this happened
What’s hard to believe here? It’s a pretty common pickup line and the most effective non confrontational way to make a person regret trying to talk to you. I’ve had basically the same experience more than once, except I rant about grammatical cases instead (just as boring for most).
Seems like kind of a dick move on her part though IMO.
more boring I would say
You almost got me monologuing for a moment there!
But yeah, it’s not inherently a topic of broad appeal, which is why it’s so effective in filtering out people who don’t ever want to talk about grammar.
Well I guess it may have happened. It just seems weird to me to be be so insufferably petty over a thing so minor.
Who was being petty? They asked, they got an honest answer.
I didn’t even realize, but you’re right. What are the options here for someone who doesn’t want to talk to a stranger in that moment?
A) She’s polite and tries to make conversation B) she doesn’t respond, C) she answers rudely, D) she gives a non seqitur, or E) she answers honestly
A) sucks for her and could create a situation where a stranger feels led on and entitled to her further attention
B or C) she’s antisocial, full of herself, or an asshole
D) she’s crazy
E) she’s insufferably petty
You’re forgetting another option ->
“Oh, I’m thinking about a fair deal right now, but I’m not really in the mood to talk about it, I’d prefer to mull it over myself.”
You can honestly and politely tell someone that you don’t want to talk to them, that you’d rather have the solitude.
This is not impossible, and it is not petty.
You can, but you’ll still get called stuck up. Or the other person will say they didn’t want to talk to you anyway and you’re pompous for assuming they did.
Well, I wouldn’t call you stuck up for doing that, I would say that a person who was politely refused a conversation, and then themselves acted stuck up and offended by this, I would percieve them as the asshole.
That would be an immature person with a large and fragile ego, reacting like a middle schooler, to the idea that not everyone thinks they are always worth talking to.
Yep, some people are extraverted assholes like that.
I’ve had many women react in this way when they approached me for whatever reason and I told them that I would just prefer to be alone, thank you.
But I’m fine with this, because they’re just making a fool of themselves.
E doesn’t need to be petty? ‘Sorry, I’m not in the mood to chat’ is fine?
I agree, I’m just using the words above that were used to characterize my honest answer.
As an autist I don’t really know how to feel about wether i am or am not in the mood to express my theoretical frameworks to explore causality with faster then light mechanics to a random stranger in public
it would be an accurate response to their question and easier then confronting a long pause as i try to gather and organise my spacetime thoughts back into a decisive communication about wether i consent to conversating.
Getting the same pickup line over and over is minor, but tedious enough that it makes you want to create your own fun.
Plus, if they are down for grammar rants, that increases the chances that we could actually have something in common.
Maybe that’d work on me. I find passion hot
Yeah, especially since the person immediately felt the need to post this on a social media. Truly a non-phone user.
Well, I found my manic pixie dream girl. I would absolutely would love to talk about Teuchitlán.
Just don’t lock anyone’s knees, and use the appropriate dating spaces? Because strangers don’t want to talk to you on the ride, it is one of the most anti-social places on Earth.
use the appropriate dating spaces
So, as someone who is terified to approach someone literally anywhere, what are the “appropriate dating spaces” now a days?
I wonder if Lemmy has a dating community.
Forget dating apps. Idk, friend of friends might recommend you?
I am just as afraid and single, so yeah.
You can talk to me on the bus if I’m not obviously doing something else.
Hard disagree. What are “appropriate dating spaces”?
Pretty sure lots of the people would love to have something serendipitous happen outside of the boring designations society expects.
What am I supposed to do? Be that creep that just hits on women? 😭
I can’t imagine that it’s not a game friend being a date, or friend of a friend who recommended me.
Or one of those dating servers/forums.
Everything else feels creepy.
Dude OP was describing was striking up a conversation with another person. Sometimes that becomes a date, sometimes it doesn’t. It’s a nice way to go about every day. You don’t need an ulterior motive. If you can imagine having the conversation with a man in the same scenario, then it’s fine IMO.
This isn’t even outside of what society expects. Striking up conversations with people is normal and human!
There are bad ways to do it, of course. In this case, I’d be rattled by the knee tap. But a little conversation is fine, and if they aren’t responding enthusiastically you can just drop it.
What am I supposed to do? Be that creep that just hits on women? 😭
I can’t imagine that it’s not a game friend being a date, or friend of a friend who recommended me.
Or one of those dating servers/forums.
Everything else feels creepy.
Don’t forget about the Tarascan Empire!
How could I forget them! The only Purépecha I ever met loved talking about them.
Having just been there, it’s very much not ignored by the tourists. Yes, me too.
I think part of the point here is going over people’s heads. She used her hyperfixation to confuse and bore the man to deflect any opportunity for him to flirt with her or ask her out until she was able to leave.
Everyone saying “jokes on you, this bus girl is so my type” would also have their ear talked off and never given the opportunity to ask her out.
Yeah, like I’d love to talk to this girl about this stuff if she wanted to talk about it, regardless of if she was interested in dating me or not, but that doesn’t seem to be the case here. She was doing it to run him off
Maybe I’m naive, but I want to think that plenty of people actually stoked about that kind of situation would rather ask to elaborate on the West Mexico civilization instead.
I think you’re right, I’m just responding to the people (who are all over this thread) saying that this is part of their manic pixie dream girl fantasy.
Even the op explains that this is a method to avoid the guy trying to pick her up.
Also my dream single serving bus friend? I’m not trying to date anyone but I am trying to subscribe for more mesoamerican archeology facts, especially if I can ask clarifying questions along the way.
You watched Fight Club then?
Here you go: Ancient Americas
This channel has incredible content
Score, free history lecture!
Is this a PSA about how I should’ve been harassing other bus passengers this entire time? I don’t understand.
depends. most places? sure, try to strike up a conversation (just don’t expect/demand one)
New York City? abso fucking lutely not. talking to a stranger on MTA for anything besides asking directions nets you the social equivalent of the death penalty
Well don’t leave me hanging about mexico! What’s over there?!
So, my partner would do this. One day, she was driving me home from work, and there was a period of extended silence between us, and we had this conversation:
Her: Whatcha thinkin’ about?
Me: What would the days of the French Revolutionary Calendar be if they were translated into Esperanto?
Her: …
Me: Well, you asked.
Exactly why my partner no longer asks me, either.
“I was wondering if people who lose lots of weight and have extra skin could have a kangaroo pouch made with their extra skin. Skin is easy to graft anywhere, so I don’t see why not… Buy would it get saggy and stretch out? Can you get a tendon implanted to keep it tight?”
Road trips are 100% podcasts now.
You could definitely make a marsupial, but I think the challenge would be keeping the pocket dry and fungus-free.
Also making sure there is enough bloodflow to the skin to keep it from just dying off.
put a drain in the bottom, that way when you shower you can wash the pouch and the water drains out. Towel dry, then throw a couple silica desiccant packs in and you’re good to go.
on my phone, researching
Oh! Let me know if you find anything. Evey time I ask a doctor they get weird about it.
No, no, this is interesting. Now I’m actually curious. I don’t know enough about how Esperanto works–aside from knowing it’s supposed to be an ideal language–to have any rational idea.
The idea behind an auxiliary language is that everybody would only need to learn two languages: their native language and the auxiliary language. You’d talk to people in your own community in your native language and use the auxiliary to talk to foreigners. This helps to preserve language diversity while enabling international communication. To facilitate this, a good auxiliary language needs to be easy to learn and flexible enough to express a wide array of concepts. Esperanto is the most popular auxiliary language.
As it turns out, the Esperanto Wikipedia does have an article on the calendar. However, the day names are presented in French, so there is still no definitive answer to this particular question lmao
i hadn’t realized it was supposed to be auxiliary. Interesting.
As it stands, English ends up being one of the most widely used second languages, which is nuts because English is a fuckin’ nightmare to learn.
Oh no! Not the confusion and boredom of someone having thoughts and interests different from mine.
This sounds perfect. Then I don’t have to be the one talking about the thing I’m thinking about for half an hour straight.
That would have been the moment she became my dream girl.
Something something I’m into that shit!
Wait so you had an interesting conversation with a guy, and you spin this as … a win, because you… let down some expectations that you just imagined he had?
You imagine you ‘trapped’ him into this conversation, like the entire thing was a dominance battle?
He… started it.
Maybe dude was just bored, thought you might make a good conversation partner, and this turned out to be correct.
‘Confusion’ that you saw could just be, you know, confusion in the sense of ‘wow i’ve never heard of these specific ideas and concepts before, and am trying to wrap my brain around them’.
Contrary to apparently popular opinion, some guys just want to have a pleasant conversation with a stranger, sometimes.
And those guys, if you just tell them you’re not in the mood for a conversation, they’ll probably understand and respect that.
Is there really no other way to conceive of socializing than as a 24/7 pvp battle of wits and hidden intentions?
She described an interaction that she was present for and how she read it. You were not there, and so instead of reading the actual situation, you are imagining what it could have been like and wondering why she didn’t interpret it in any of those ways. That makes no sense.
they’ll probably understand and respect that."
You’re right, they probably will! Except the small percentage that don’t and become so dangerous that women feel the need to shut any man down, just in case.
She
Did you honest to god look up that person’s Tumblr account to ascertain their gender? That is one hell of a power move
No.
She states, in the OP story, that she imagines this guy had ‘manic pixi dream girl hopes’, in regards to herself.
So, it is probably reasonable to assume that she is ‘she’, or at the very least, is feminine presenting.
You can also just see that the profile pic is low res, but appears to depict a young woman.
Reading comprehension, attention to detail, is all I needed here.
Also, I don’t know how it would be a ‘power move’ to search for publically available information, on the internet, to ascertain more context.
I guess if her account were locked down and I literally hacked into being able to see it, that would be a bit nuts, but… afaik most stuff on tumblr is just public, but I don’t really know, never really used it.
I assumed the GUY was the manic pixie dream girl
If you are acknowledging that you misread it… ok…
…maybe don’t jump right to being so incredibly, conspiratorially critical of people, assuming things about them and fabricating insinuations of things they’ve done.
It takes honesty to admit a mistake, that’s admirable.
Maybe slow down a bit, make sure you got the details correct, next time you feel an urge to be very critical of someone?
I also admire your honesty in admitting that your assumption of that user’s gender was based on conjecture (albeit plausible)
Everybody makes conjectures and assumptions based on limited context in nearly every thing they ever experience.
I’m Autistic, so I’m highly aware of the assumptions I am making, and why I am making them.
It just takes me longer to fully think through them, which is often too slow for ‘normal’ conversation tempo, but when I have time to think and fully explain myself… I’m very analytical and detail oriented.
The “manic pixie dream girl” part of the story gives that away.
Fucking seriously. Internet armchair psychiatrists are nuts.
Correct, I do not trust this person’s ability to accurately read the emotional expressions of other people, given that she entirely invented a motive of the other person, with no provided evidence to justify this other person’s motive as being actually real, and then interpreted/framed the entire story using this as a narrative device.
There are reasons why eyewitness testimony is considered the lowest quality of evidence in both legal and scientific settings: our memories are highly malleable and innacurate, this is affected by many factors.
This person is literally the definition of an unreliable narrator.
Yeah, you know your own inner thoughts, with high to perfect accuracy.
You cannot mind read someone else’s intentions and inner thoughts to anywhere near that same level of accuracy, especially not without explanation.
When you interpret other people’s actions through the lense of what you assume they are thinking, their presumed motivations, you are projecting your expectations onto them, and your experience of them is then molded around this.
Also, entirely random, stranger v stranger, male on female violence, is considerably more rare than say, the likelihood an average person will be injured or die in a car accident, or even die from a serious fall… or entirely random, stranger v stranger, male on male violence.
Male on female violence is a serious problem, but this is between men and women who know each other and are not strangers, who are family members, coworkers, partners, ex-partners, etc.
It’s… a story
Classic confusion between Manic Pixie Dream Girl and Manic Pixie Nightmare Girl.
I prefer mxpx
I would love to listen to any girl go off about any hyper fixation. It’d beat all the conversations I’ve had to endure about fucking tiktok or instagram make up artist drama.
I would love to listen to any girl go off about any hyper fixation. It’d beat all the conversations I’ve had to endure about [lists a common hyper fixation].
Those were just fixations. There was no in depth analysis or deep examination of the factors or parties involved. It was entirely surface level interest of a surface level topic. Just because someone pays attention to something that doesn’t make it a hyper fixation.
Alright, I can’t say what your conversations have been like. It’s just been my experience that if someone has one sentence to say about yt/TikTok drama, they have an essay’s worth of follow up regarding what previous drama precipitated the current drama, what third parties have to say about it and whether any bridges are being burned, who’s in the right and why, and so on…
Right? Like, yes please, tell me more about archeology and west mexico
You say that, but if it’s cars or sports oh lord please get me out of here
I admire the passion but ideally from another room
Lesson learned. Look at your phone even if you aren’t looking at your phone.
The manic pixie dream girl who knows about ecology and climate science.
‘There are actual several contenders for the title “equation of despair”’
